The Feral Mommy: December 2011

Another year has come to an end and what a year it's been. I think for me, this year was all about taking control of my life and who I want to be. I did a lot of soul searching and figuring out what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I've eliminated the people that hurt me in a take no prisoners sort of way that surprised even me. I've loved, I've lost, but most importantly, I have survived and it has all made me stronger, wiser and better than I was when I wrote this blog last year. I couldn't have done this without most of the people that will be reading this. You've picked me up when I was down (or too drunk to walk), you've held my hand when I cried and you've been there for me when I needed it. That is what life is about. Appreciate the love that others have to offer because it is really what makes you rich in this life. So let us drink a cup of kindness yet for times gone by as I look back on the milestones that made this year what it was (or you can just go read all of the blogs from this year, which you should have been doing all along):

* I married my best friend. Yes, it sounds cheesy and cliche, but now I understand why people say it. After years of kicking, screaming and protesting the outdated custom of marriage, I finally walked the plank and married the man that I couldn't stand when I first met him. And we did it on Friday the 13th, to boot. He and I are in it for the long haul now and I am thankful that I drug my feet for 26 years until I met him. I love you, Matt.

I may have been having a SLIGHT case of cold feet at the bachelorette party.

Yay! Even though I forgot to write the exchanging of rings into our vows, we managed to get married.

One big, happy family.

After Big Daddy jammed a cupcake into my eye socket.

Our beautiful wedding cake. It could not have turned out more perfect.

The groom and his bride at the family BBQ to celebrate our marriage. The best day of my year.

* Nutt turned the big ONE. I never thought I would have more kids but God has a plan for us all and now I can't imagine my life without my pooping, crying, sleep-sucking bundle of joy. He has come so far since last year. He is walking and talking (well, kind of talking) and I love him more every day. He is so different from the skinny little baby who only moved one side of his face that I brought home from the hospital, but he is still Mommy's little Nutt.

Getting ready for presents. He cared more about the wrapping paper than anything that was inside.

He had his cake and he was gonna eat it, too!

He partied so hard that he passed out. There's no way this kid was switched at birth.

His one year picture. God, I love my Goofy Goober!

* Evel turned 12. That means he is only one year away from becoming a moody, mouthy teenager and I'm not sure that I'm ready to let go of the kid that was my only baby until Tink came into the picture four years ago. We've been through so much together and the harder he tries to pull away, the tighter I want to hold onto him before he's gone. He has grown so much in the past year (from being below my shoulders to being as tall as me) and I know that I am going to have to watch him transform into a man eventually, but all I want is this one last year for him to be my little boy.

Our family photo last Thanksgiving (notice the boy in the striped shirt)

Our family portrait from this Thanksgiving (yes, the boy in the glasses is the same kid that was wearing the striped shirt)

Last year of Midget football. I am so proud of him!

* Tink turned 7. When I met her, she was a little four year-old with curly blonde hair that liked to draw and still used a sippy cup. Now she has turned into a beautiful little girl that likes to straighten her curly hair and watch Spongebob instead of draw. She has been through a lot in her 7 short years but with the love that Big Daddy and I are determined to give her, I know that she will blossom into a beautiful young woman in a few years. Until then, I am going to enjoy every second that she decides to let her hair curly and every picture that covers up the fridge.

Christmas of 2010. Her size 6 jammies still fit her.

Christmas 2011. Wearing her size 8 shirt. :( Our babies are growing up.

* My youngest sister, Trid, did become a teenager. I still remember holding her little, tiny, 6 lb butt at the hospital and now she is 13 and well over halfway to becoming an adult. She's rude, mouthy and gets into trouble all the time...I guess she learned from me. I love you Trid!

The birthday girl

The aftermath of the "Clothes in a Bag" game

You know it's a party when my kid sticks his tongue to a frozen pole!

* Nana S was called home. Even typing those words causes a stream of tears. On December 10, the world lost one of the greatest women that had ever tread upon it. She was absolutely one of the greatest influences on my life and I still hear her telling me to walk tall and be proud of who I am. She also told me that love is something that is shared between two people and if your love isn't being returned, walk away and give it to someone that will return it. There are so many lessons that I learned from her that I will pass to my children and I am so thankful that I had her in my life for almost 30 years. I am trying to remember another saying of hers to get me through this: Don't cry because someone died, smile because they existed.

I still remember the day this was taken. Nana was playing peek-a-boo like they did on Sesame Street.

My first birthday with Nana. She made me banana bread and I've loved it ever since. She used to tell me to follow my nose because you could smell it baking before you even got to her front door.

Nana, me and Pappy on Easter 1984

Throwing pebble in Rocky Spring. It has since dried up but I remember our walks and I still remember the smell of "Halloween" that you could smell in the Autumn.

Nana and Evel. I am so thankful that he got to spend so many good years with her.

* My friend, Eli, was killed in a car accident. I hadn't talked to him since Nutt was born and he called to congratulate me, but that's how our relationship always was. We would go months without speaking and when we reunited, it was like we had never stopped talking. He was kind and always there to lend a smile to someone that needed it. The world lost a very unique spirit but I know he and El Kappitan are mixing drinks and cooking delicious meals for their customers at the Cafe in the sky. Rest in peace, Eli.

Fishing and beers make for a great summer day.

* On a happier note, January 24, 2011, marked the very first International Moebius Syndrome Awareness Day. This was a diagnosis that was given to Nutt when he was born. It was a very scary and difficult time for our family but thanks to the online Moebius Syndrome community, we were able to be educated and had a support network in place anytime we needed it. Everyone has become like an extended family to us and I don't know what I would have done without them. I am looking forward to celebrating the 2nd Annual MSAD and meeting everyone at the bi-annual conference this year! Please visit the Many Faces of Moebius Syndrome website for more information on MSAD, as well as to read people's stories (make sure to read Page 1 and Page 2), get some resources and order your very own MSAD shirt!

My Moebius Syndrome Hero

Nutt's big debut in our local paper! The article ran on MSAD.

* Big Daddy and I took NOLA by storm for our honeymoon. It was six days of us basically running around like drunken college kids in a city that celebrates celebrating. We drank, we ate and we were merry (except when I lost the camera). We met new people, ate every Cajun and Creole delicacy until we thought we would pop and binged on the greatest Zydeco bands that we could have had the pleasure of listening to. We drank in every aspect of this beautiful city and it intoxicated Big Daddy (as it did to me prior) with something other than booze. I cannot wait to return in a few years to the the city that will forever have my heart.

My big ass Strawberry Abita at Deanie's Seafood Restaurant. Best beer EVER.

Peeking in a mannequin's undies. I knew he stuffed!

The best mint julep in the entire city. It was made by Jamie at Maison Bourbon. We went back for them daily.

Big Daddy and his big ass Abita.

Big Daddy at the Cajun Zydeco Music Festival/Louisiana Seafood Festival/Creole Tomato Festival

The pink balloon penis guy outside our hotel. This was a huge hit with my friends on FB.

A tranny directing traffic in the middle of a downpour. Only in NOLA.

Waiting to take our romantic carriage ride. It never happened because they couldn't fill the cart.

Big Daddy and I at Erin Rose Bar. This was the best bar in the city and I cannot wait to visit again.

Last night on Bourbon Street. I cried on our way to the airport the next day.

* I got a minivan (and actually liked it). This is something I swore I would never do but after having three kids and babysitting another one during the summer, it became a necessary evil (unless I wanted to get a part-time job to afford to put gas in the Suburban). Right now, my poor van is sitting in the driveway with a leaky power steering pump and I'm somewhat heartbroken about it. I guess this is the year that I changed my mind about everything.

The odometer a few thousand miles ago

* We welcomed my new nephew, Bubba (name has been changed to protect his cuteness), into the world. My sister and her fiance couldn't just let me have the youngest and cutest for longer than 9 months so they made this little guy. And adorable he is! Welcome to the family, Bubba! (Run for your sanity as soon as you learn to walk)

Hey Bubba!

* I found a way to make my professional dreams come true in the way of the Pittsburgh Institute of Mortuary Science. Yes, this spring I will begin my journey to fulfill my sixth grade dream of becoming a mortician. I know it's a bit morbid but business is booming. I am hoping that this will eventually lead to Big Daddy and I owning and operating our own funeral home in the future. I hear that people are dying to get in already! (buh-domp-bomp-ching!)

* On September 8, our family was impacted by the flood after Tropical Storm Lee took it's good ol' time to travel up the Eastern coast. Watching the flood water rise as our family and friends tried to help us save anything we could was absolutely the most disparaging feeling in the entire world. Trying to drive my van through a rising flood water that went from 2 inches to one foot in a matter of minutes was absolutely terrifying. Standing in my kitchen with my youngest sister, oldest son and baby and watching the water lapping at the last few inches below my door frames and not knowing how to get these kids to safety was a feeling that goes so much deeper than terror that I cannot describe it in words. I hope that no one ever has to experience it. But the worst part of that day was walking with these kids through a foot and a half of flood water and praying with every ounce of faith that I had in my bones that we made it safely to dry ground. From there, we stood and watched as the water made it to the doors and went into our house. We lost some things but we all made it out safely. I cannot stress enough that the things in your house are exactly that...just things. Save what is important and get out while you have plenty of time. Hindsight is 20/20 and I will never put my kids in that position again.

Our poor little house as the water was just below the door frames. Big Daddy took this because I was NOT going back into that water.

Big Daddy waded back through the water to save my Mama Jade plant that was given to me by a friend a month before he passed away. This is one of the many reasons I love this man so freaking much.

One last picture of our house before they closed off the island.

Our mud room...literally.

The stuff on the tables survived. The stuff on the milk crates didn't. Oh yeah, our carpet was blue the day before.

What's missing from this picture? Oh yeah, OUR FREAKING HOT TUB!

The collection of junk that was stopped by our front hedges.

Here's what I think of cleaning.

The pile of trash beside the overflowing dumpster that they parked in front of our house.

We still took time to remember 9/11

23.5" watermark on our kitchen cabinets

Hey look, we found the hot tub! It was in a field about 1/2 mile South of our house. It's still there if anyone wants it.

* After the flood we began our six week "camping" adventure. The good people at Penn Avon Campground let us park our dilapidated old camper in their campground for the duration of the time that it took for our landlord to repair the damage and for us to fight with FEMA for any assistance that they might be able to give us. I have complained many times about needing a bigger house but after living in a camper with a family of five (and occasionally having my nephew, Shitbrick, stay with us), this place seems huge. Not only that, we found that our water heater was cracked which meant boiling water to do dishes and hiking to the bath houses for showers. We found that the roof leaked...A LOT. We also found that the campground is prone to flooding when a few weeks later, we were also evacuated from there. It was a very trying time for me but that which does not kill me (or drive me to killing someone else), will only make me stronger.

Nutt playing in puddles since there was NOTHING to do at the campground.

Evel on his 12th birthday. There were plenty of walnuts around for him to try out his new slingshot.

Big Daddy in his "living room." I was just happy that we had cable for a change.

Camper kitty (AKA Weezy Jefferson). She was rescued by another couple in the campground when we were evacuated.

The last day. Kind of bittersweet. Who am I kidding? I danced a freaking jig!

Nutt painting his pumpkin

Digging out pumpkin guts

Daddy torturing the children.

* In August, after 3 years of putting up with BFBF's BS, we were awarded 50/50 legal and physical custody of Tink and she will remain in our school district for as long as we live in the district. Not only that, the judge laid into BFBF and told her to get her shit together and stop the animosity toward Big Daddy for their daughter's sake. Now instead of seeing Tink every other weekend and Wednesday nights, we see her from Friday after school to Thursday morning (with a switch on Tuesday). For the first time, it feels like she is actually included in our family. It's a wonderful feeling. We also hashed out the holiday schedule and the two weeks vacation time in the summer so BFBF can't pull her power trip games. She still tries to control every little thing that she possibly can but she can't push Big Daddy around and use Tink as a pawn anymore. I hope she regrets kicking him around so much and wishes she would have just let him lie. Karma is a bitch.

Big Daddy sans facial jewelery.

* My oldest had his first broken bone (honestly, I can't believe it took him this long). After going over a gnarly bike ramp, Evel didn't quite stick the landing and wound up in the ER with what the doctor called "quite an impressive break." Yeah, if he's going to do something like this, he goes all in. I wish I could say the same about his grades. So Evel spent 8 weeks of his summer in a neon green (and very stinky) cast. No swimming or having fun, except it did seem to make a nice carry all for him considering they found a quarter and a Pokemon trading card inside when they removed it.

Crunch

Evel after he realized how badly his summer was going to suck since he had to wear a cast.

Our attempt at Redneck waterproofing so Evel could at least stand in the pool.

* This Spring/Summer marked Weddingfest. I was invited to more weddings this year than I ever have been in my life. Congrats to Twig and Nate, Shauna and Brian, Liz and Adam (finally!) and Danielle and Zene! Also congrats to K and Kyle who FINALLY got engaged this year and are planning to get married a day before Big Daddy and I's first year anniversary! Oh yeah, congrats to Big Daddy and I!

My Liverpool besties at Twig's wedding. Congrats!

The beautiful Lizzie G being escorted down the aisle by Poppa G

* We spent a long weekend at Buttonwood Campground (while I still enjoyed camping) with the in-laws for our mini summer vacation. We had a site right along the Juniata River and enjoyed kayaking, swimming, mini golf and so much more! The kids even got a visit from Santa for Christmas in July. We celebrated Tink's birthday and Pap Pap took everyone cruising around in his golf cart (and even let Evel drive). It was a really cool campground and as long as my PTSD from the flood camping adventure is gone, I would like to go back next year to make some more memories with the family.

My photogenic children (and cousin Beck)

Happy Birthday Tink! That cake better taste amazing for as much as it cost on short notice.

Nutt and Santa.

Swimming with Tink

Nutt enjoying nature in the form of eating it.

Pap Pap's golf cart express

* In August, we had a family reunion for my dad's side of the family. We used to do this every year and I looked forward to it because (with the exception of Nana S) this was the family that I was close to when I was growing up. We haven't had one since Shitbrick was Nutt's age (he's 8 now) so this was a really welcomed change. We spent all day eating and laughing and celebrating the Neffster's (my great grandma) birthday. The crowd wasn't as big as it used to be but I was thankful to see so many familiar faces and I hope to do it again next year.

Bubba and Daddy. He looks terrified, but I swear he was laughing his arse off.

Aunt Tina and Nutt. I make that face sometimes when she's around. JK.

The Neffster and 3 of her 5 children. The other two were not available due to prior "legal" commitments.

The whole brood.

I just put this one in here cuz my husband is hot.

Poppi!

* I got glasses. Yeah, that's all I'm going to say because I'm still not completely happy about it.

Guess who the oldest on is? Yep, the one in the middle WITH THE GLASSES. The others would be Evel, Trid, Nutt, Tink, Satan, Bubba and Shitbrick.

That's about the extent of my fabulous year. It was one hell of a bumpy ride but I've learned and grown and I have to take the good with the bad. Thanks for reading the blog. I will be back after the new year to keep you posted on my family's antics. Happy Holidays! (And just for fun, here are a few more pictures that didn't really fit anywhere, but I loved so much I thought I would share).