I had a conference with Perry County Domestic Relations this morning because Evel's deadbeat dad petitioned to have support dropped. Again. This is the third year in a row that he's done this sighting his reason as he does not see Evel (his choice, not mine). Apparently in his world, if you shun the physical responsibility of your children, you are not obligated to any financial responsibility either. It must be nice to be so delusional.
But I was yet again ordered to appear for a child support conference. PCDR is now 45 minutes to an hour away from where I live, dependent upon how fast or slow the driver in front of you can navigate Route 34. So I called and bitched. In this case, something actually went our way and I was granted a teleconference. Sweet! This means that Big Daddy wouldn't have to lose and entire days pay so I could drive an hour down there in the middle of the day, listen to the violins playing Douchebag Dad's song for an hour and then drive an hour home. I was set and ready!
Except for the part where I forgot to get all of my info together (pay stubs, taxes, insurance info). The court officer told me that it was no problem as long as I had the info in front of me, including the tax info that was locked in our safe. The safe to which the key was dangling from Big Daddy's keyring at his work...you know, the work that he didn't have to miss because I now had a teleconference? This would have been fine and dandy if our Internet was working. But instead of being able to go online and print a copy of my taxes because our Poedunk cable company can't keep their customers serviced, I had to call Big Daddy and have him drive the whole way home with the key. I normally would have just driven to get it but I was stuck at home WAITING ON THE CABLE GUY!
Thankfully, I have the best significant other in the world, who also understands that I have the short term memory of a gnat. He came home, unlocked the safe and saved the day! Or so I fucking thought until the phone rang...
At 11:30, the conference began. The court officer got me on the phone and asked me all about my life.
Was I working? No.
Why was I not working? I have a 6 month old baby to take care of and I can't afford daycare for my oldest son because his dad is a waste of oxygen.
Are you currently breastfeeding this baby? WTF? No. I didn't know that my son's eating habits were of importance to Domestic Relations.
Why am I not collecting unemployment from when Micheal's closed? Because I made roughly enough to cover the cost of gas to get there and that amount didn't qualify for unemployment.
What color underwear do you have on? Okay, she didn't ask that but I would not have been surprised.
So after she interrogated me on everything from my baby to my boobies, she tells me that she is going to try to get D-bag Dad on the line. Please hold. So I'm holding. And I'm holding. Then I held a little more. Finally she gets back on the line and tells me that he isn't answering at the number that he provided. Then it hit me. That asshole had requested a teleconference, too!
Number one, he wanted to drag me into court because I'm sure he knows that it's a
Not in Perry County. The woman that we always get stuck dealing with goes on to tell me that she would try to get in touch with him later. Seriously? So he gets a second chance to miss a court date? I could see if this was the first time that he had slipped up or petitioned the court, but he does this every fucking year! How blind are you people?? He doesn't pay support for a year and doesn't go to jail, he misses court date, he blatantly violates court orders and you're going to get in touch with him later?
So then this woman goes on to tell me that the support order will never be dropped unless I request it or Evel is adopted by Big Daddy. This I knew. She tells me that D-bag is looking for a little bit of relief, even just $20 a week. Really? Evel only gets $45 a week from D-bag right now. I guess if D-bag needs an extra $20 a week to blow on drugs and strippers, $25 a week is a fair amount for me to use to raise a kid nowadays (be careful, I don't want anyone to slip and fall on the sarcasm that was dripping from that statement). She also tells me that pending the subpoena that was sent to his employer to verify the wage change from $10 to $8 an hour, the case will be reviewed and the amount will be adjusted accordingly and I will receive a notice in the mail about their decision.
Wh-wh-what? Apparently they are reviewing my case and his other child support case to see if they can provide him with any "relief." Relief? Where is my fucking relief? I was a single mom for a long damn time and I know what it's like to struggle. He could care less about any of his kids and they're trying to get him some relief? Give him a tube of Preparation H and bottle of Rolaids and tell him to suck it up and be a fucking man for a change. I don't even get the state minimum amount of child support and I have not asked for a raise, even a cost of living raise, since all of this was started back in 2000. How in the hell are they going to lower anything? And I was told that after they received the info from the income subpoena and figured out "where he is with his job," they would give me their decision. Where he is? That's a great fucking question. Where has he been since he abandoned his son when he was three? Where has he been instead of working to pay the child support for that same son? Where has he been instead of sitting in jail because he doesn't pay the child support? Where is he instead of on the telephone with you because he requested this fucking conference? When you figure it out lady, I hope you can fucking tell me!
And so help me god if this is because I took a year off from working to take care of a baby with a disability, I will flip my fucking lid on those people. And I'm going back to school in the fall to get a nursing degree so I don't have to depend on this piece of shit to help me take care of a child that he doesn't want anything to do with. Full time schooling is the same thing as full time employment as far as the state laws are concerned. Between all the shit that we've had to deal with from D-bag Dad and Big Fat Bitch Face, I have read the laws so many time that should be a fucking lawyer.
Basically, we're just supposed to wait and see how PCDR feels like screwing us this time. We'll receive a letter in the mail and I have 20 days to contest their decision if I don't agree with it. Unless it goes up, you're GD right I don't agree with it after all the shit this man has put us through and gotten to walk away from. He works less and less to avoid his responsibilities and doesn't care who he hurts, namely my son. I swear to god, if I saw him crossing the street while I was driving, I would
I'm a big girl and I can take care of myself, but when you hurt my kids, it's a whole new ballgame. He's done more than enough damage by abandoning his child and my son knows what happens at Domestic Relations. He's old enough to put it together in his own head and he's realized that when he sees that letter from them in the mail, it means the man that is supposed to be nurturing and caring for him is trying to get out of the last little bit of responsibility that he has to him. I hate him this much because seeing my sons face when the letters come and hearing him call his dad by his real name and knowing that it hurts him breaks my heart into a million little pieces every damned time. And knowing that I can't do anything about it makes it that much worse.
All of this shit that we deal with when he crawls out from under his rock is like being forced onto a roller coaster that you've ridden before and knowing that it kicked your ass, but you have to get on again anyway. So now we just have to wait for this ride to come to a complete stop and see how sick it actually made us this time.
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