Another Letter to You on Your Birthday

Micheal,

Yet another year and another letter that I'm writing to you on the anniversary of a birthday that we'll never get to celebrate. Some of the sting has dissolved but the wound has not yet healed. I still miss you like it was yesterday. I still dream of you and I having conversations as if nothing has changed and until you tell me that it's time for you to go. Then the dream will vanish and I'm left with the harsh reality that you are truly gone. I think it's harder this year because my safe haven is gone. I always took comfort in knowing that with the cafe, a little bit of your legacy remained and I could go there to celebrate your life and your accomplishments. This year we do not have that. Everyone that I thought of as family in that restaurant have scattered like leaves in the wind. I understand that it had to close and everyone had to move on but it doesn't mean that it hurt any less. It felt like I lost that last little bit of you. I watched them slowly tear down all of the memories that I had made with not only you, but with everyone else that I met through Micheal's Cafe. What other people thought was just a restaurant was like a family home to me. To see that be torn to the ground was hell. I sometimes sit and wonder if things would have been different if you were still around. If we would still be as close as we were when you died or would we have moved on after a while and I wouldn't sit here every year writing letters like this to your ghost. I guess I'll never really know. Maybe the next time you visit my dreams I will remember to ask. But until then, please know that none of us have forgotten you and we all still love you and we will hold your memory in our hearts until the day that we join you. I'm sure you've found Eli and you guys are celebrating like fools wherever you both are. Until then, know that I miss you old friend. Happy Birthday.

Jenn